Sunday, August 29, 2010

I spent all of yesterday not on the internet. I went to bed the night before with websites, comments, photos, tags, web addresses, images, and on and on and on and on of just JUNK from being on the internet too much and too long and I needed a break. So I took one.

I have been attacked physically lately and I know it's a mirror image of the spiritual. Do you ever have that? Next time you're sick, ask Holy Spirit why and if you've stepped out of line/are being tested/etc. Sometimes you just are coming down with something, because we're humans on this earth and we get stuff, but sometimes it goes deeper than that, and this time, it went deeper than that.

Without all the details, I will just say this: with a week's worth of yuckiness, a night of unbearable pain that landed me in the emergency room (believe it or not...tooth related, which leads to your mouth, which leads to your whole head...very bad) and a morning of some more unexpected pain in another part of me, I realized I had been going about things in general all wrong lately. I had been doing everything by myself. On my own.

There is something (stupid) in me that says I can't enjoy life until everything is perfect.  Like the house, Ruby, our cars, the landscape, the groceries, the appointment book, our finances, laundry, and on and on. So I would strip myself of everything I had to physically do all of it on my own. And it's funny...I have made it so known and declared to heaven and earth that I am Yahweh's and He is mine and I have told Him over and over again how I am submitted to Him and we are one and so guess what? He held me accountable and just wouldn't let me get by with making myself miserable.
Thank you, Father.

I remember a long time ago Kevin and I asked Yahweh to make it to when we step away from Him and His flow of things, that we would "find ourselves in a miserable place". Those were our exact words. Because we don't want to do it without Him! I LOVE that when I step out of His blessing, I know immediately! Sometimes it takes me and week and some serious pain, but hey...I'll take it. It's worth it.

So this morning, I woke up feeling like a new person. Because I have laid it all at my Father's feet and have walked away. I love how this Kingdom thing works.

2 comments:

Larsen Family said...

Amen,

I too, have a foot that hurts when I start to do things on my own or "stress out, or lose trust". It is my wake up call to trust, have faith and that HE is in control.

A few years ago before we moved here, I slipped in my kitchen and almost broke my foot. It was swollen for weeks and could barely walk on it. It got x-rayed, but it wasn't broken. Yet, it hurt. Throughout that process, I had to BE STILL and know that HE is God. I literally had to lay on my bed and not move. Not much to do but read the Bible. :) From that point on when I start to stress out or lose my faith; he reminds me that he is still in control and to Be still.

Bethany said...

Amen!

Sunday, August 29, 2010

I spent all of yesterday not on the internet. I went to bed the night before with websites, comments, photos, tags, web addresses, images, and on and on and on and on of just JUNK from being on the internet too much and too long and I needed a break. So I took one.

I have been attacked physically lately and I know it's a mirror image of the spiritual. Do you ever have that? Next time you're sick, ask Holy Spirit why and if you've stepped out of line/are being tested/etc. Sometimes you just are coming down with something, because we're humans on this earth and we get stuff, but sometimes it goes deeper than that, and this time, it went deeper than that.

Without all the details, I will just say this: with a week's worth of yuckiness, a night of unbearable pain that landed me in the emergency room (believe it or not...tooth related, which leads to your mouth, which leads to your whole head...very bad) and a morning of some more unexpected pain in another part of me, I realized I had been going about things in general all wrong lately. I had been doing everything by myself. On my own.

There is something (stupid) in me that says I can't enjoy life until everything is perfect.  Like the house, Ruby, our cars, the landscape, the groceries, the appointment book, our finances, laundry, and on and on. So I would strip myself of everything I had to physically do all of it on my own. And it's funny...I have made it so known and declared to heaven and earth that I am Yahweh's and He is mine and I have told Him over and over again how I am submitted to Him and we are one and so guess what? He held me accountable and just wouldn't let me get by with making myself miserable.
Thank you, Father.

I remember a long time ago Kevin and I asked Yahweh to make it to when we step away from Him and His flow of things, that we would "find ourselves in a miserable place". Those were our exact words. Because we don't want to do it without Him! I LOVE that when I step out of His blessing, I know immediately! Sometimes it takes me and week and some serious pain, but hey...I'll take it. It's worth it.

So this morning, I woke up feeling like a new person. Because I have laid it all at my Father's feet and have walked away. I love how this Kingdom thing works.

2 comments:

Larsen Family said...

Amen,

I too, have a foot that hurts when I start to do things on my own or "stress out, or lose trust". It is my wake up call to trust, have faith and that HE is in control.

A few years ago before we moved here, I slipped in my kitchen and almost broke my foot. It was swollen for weeks and could barely walk on it. It got x-rayed, but it wasn't broken. Yet, it hurt. Throughout that process, I had to BE STILL and know that HE is God. I literally had to lay on my bed and not move. Not much to do but read the Bible. :) From that point on when I start to stress out or lose my faith; he reminds me that he is still in control and to Be still.

Bethany said...

Amen!